Decisions

Life is made up of decisions and consequences. If you've ever seen the movie Sliding Doors, you've seen how little decisions (even subconscious) can have significant consequences. It's strange to think about how a small decision, such as stopping at a yellow light, could down the road have prevented (or caused) a car accident (just an example).

Last May I made a conscious decision to shake things up a bit. I purposely chose to leave my comfortable (yet insanely annoying/frustrating) job and move out of state for something new.

I'm of the firm belief that everything happens for a reason and we should have no regrets about the decisions we make. However, now that I've been in CT for about ten months some doubts are creeping in.

I don't doubt that I made the correct decision job wise. However, I have come to feel some regret about leaving the great comfortable life that I had in NY. Sometime I think about my old town and actually get pangs of longing in my stomach. Pangs!

Overall, I'm not a fan of Long Island. However, I happen to think that I lived in the greatest town on the island (Huntington). I lived within walking distance of everything I could ever need and after two years there had finally made some local friends. Aside from the centipedes in my apartment, I had no complaints.

My town was fun. It was a hot spot and people wanted to visit me. We could go out to lots of bars and never have to worry about driving (similar to in the city). Norwalk doesn't evoke quite the same feelings. I like my apartment and having a pool in the summer kicks ass, but I have to drive everywhere and it just isn't the same.

I've always considered myself a career driven girl, which is perhaps why I didn't think much of leaving my established life behind for something new. But now that it's been almost a year I can't help but wish for the past (although not my job of the past).

Perhaps I'm learning what so many people have learned before me, that your personal life should come first with the job in the background. I never thought like this and always tended to let my job define who I was.

Maybe the purpose of me moving to CT was to learn things about myself, in which case I guess it's been successful. But what happens when the things you learn aren't what you expected?

Not to mention, I miss my family and friends.